Day 62: Kathy McLeskey

(Reblogging from Note A Day.)

I’m often amazed and count it as a great blessing when I consider the personal, wonderful stories I have from Camino life.

Note A Day

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Dear Kathy,

For the longest, I scoffed at notions of Camino Magic. I was wrong. You’re a slice of Camino Magic if I’ve ever seen one.

Happy birthday, my pilgrim friend. I wish you the happiest of days.

At the heart of everything I’ve learned about life are two simple things: (1) Everyone needs a cheerleader; and (2) we’re all at our very best when we’re cheering for others. It’s my good fortune to share both experiences with you.

As much as I’ve tried, words may never adequately describe my initial desire to walk the Way of St. James, or to convey the experience itself. If it’s not possible, that’s okay. Perhaps the best stories are the ones that remain forever in the privacy of our hearts.

Dana and I, meeting our friend Kathy McKleskey in Santiago de Compostela last November. We'd been social media friends for a year, but this was our first time to meet personally ... of all places. Dana and I, meeting our friend Kathy McLeskey in Santiago de Compostela last November. We’d been social media friends for a year, but…

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Day 52: Helen Corbett

From my current daily blogging project at Note A Day. A fond memory from that first pilgrimage.

Note A Day

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Dear Helen,

It may surprise you, but I’ve reflected on what you wrote so many times. It was just a simple social media post, yet one of the most endearing things anyone’s ever said to me.

screen-shot-2017-02-21-at-5-53-06-am Snow in the elevations at O Cebreiro.

Day 39. I’d walked almost exactly 800 kilometers. Up and over a mountain range. Through cold, rainy wind and lots of mud. One night of delusional fever. There was an eight-hour blizzard. And my lower left shin was visually hemorrhaging blood now. But only one day of hobbling remained.

A friend of a friend sent a message suggesting maybe it would be best to call the whole thing off. Come back and finish another time. Nothing is worth that kind of pain, she said. “You gave it a great effort,” I read her final suggestive words as my blood pressure spiked.

Oh my Lord, someone’s recommending…

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12 Stories in 6 Words

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His nursing home luxury? A window.

Sundown. Next morning in the afterlife.

It was his tenth second chance.

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East or West? Got a coin?

Civility was not on his agenda.

Press the button. Sleep comes soon.

Forty days of walking. It’s finished.

Married 30 years. All is lost.

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The ancient oak saw history unfold.

Arriving with new hope, access denied.

At the finish line, he wept.

If you’d just touched me more.screen-shot-2017-02-20-at-3-11-51-am

 

 

 

El Gusto es Mio … the pleasure is mine.

There we sat like knots on a log, two late-40-something men bored and useless at one of the tediously never-ending Junior Auxiliary fundraisers, when my buddy offered a dubious reading recommendation.

screen-shot-2017-01-25-at-9-27-39-am“That new Truett Cathy book is pretty good. I think you’d enjoy it,” he said, staring off into space toward the luxury porta-potties apparently necessary for this particular outdoor charity event at the “ranch.”

“Chick-fil-A?” I responded, silently scoffing at the likelihood of some fast-food propaganda promo and how I might benefit from it.

“That’s him,” he said.

“Okay, I’ll check it out,” I lied.

“Hey, did you check out those porta potties?”

“Yep. Sweet. Very sweet. I think I’ll go back in and pee again.”

Two days later he shows up at my office Monday morning with his used, dog-eared copy.

Trapped. Great Caesar’s Ghost.

But I read it. And something stuck.

***

Truett Cathy was a fine man. He did a lot of good, instilled much goodwill, set an example for the kind of life to which I aspire.  He had his haters. Who doesn’t these days?

But Cathy founded his business with good people. From corporate execs to the janitorial staff, everything was/is personal. And he successfully created an environment that makes people happy to work at Chick-fil-A. He wanted people to give customers heartfelt service with a genuine smile – the kind that comes naturally.

The next time you run through a Chick-fil-A, listen for a key word.

Pleasure.

What do you hear at the speaker greeting? “Welcome to Chick-fil-A. It will be my pleasure to serve you. Order whenever you’re ready.”

Need ketchup? “It will be my pleasure.”

Soft drink too flat? “It’ll be my pleasure to replace that sir/ma’am.”

Cathy created an environment making it a pleasure for his employees to work there, and they pass their pleasure on to the customer. However you may feel about their public positions on certain issues, rarely will you have a bad experience at Chick-fil-A.

***

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Civility’s rapid decay during the last two years has on occasion made me physically ill.

Through modeling from public figures of the highest profile, by way of mass media, the entertainment industry, the lingering effects of a recession from which some will never, ever recover, and the slow, drip, drip, conditioning it creates in a very numb society, it’s now easier to treat others with incredulous disdain than with kindness. We’re almost unconscious in our rude behavior.

The Resistance??? There are may things we need to resist now, and the players in and around 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue may be our least worries. We must resist becoming void of all kindness and civility. The hard part is, no one can do it but you.

I made a decision in October than I will not bow to civil decay. That requires an intentional, conscious effort every day in taking responsibility for myself. Add to a plan of a balanced diet, exercise and spiritual well-being, this:

Intentional gratitude. I’m pausing for it several times a day now.

As I focus on what’s good, (especially people in my life) it actually requires less and less effort over time. It makes it much easier to take my eyes off myself and look outward.

Truth is, it makes almost everything a PLEASURE. Regularly, throughout the day, and with no force of thought I find myself in conversation regularly saying …

“It’s my pleasure.”

“The pleasure is mine.”

“It couldn’t be more of a pleasure.”

And I’m laughing as I write this, but I mean it. Things are much more a pleasure now than they were when I paid attention to all the garbage. I’m not going back into the mire. That behavior is unacceptable. I reject it. This is my Resistance.

And so in everything I now pursue, it’s become an unintentional mantra, and I wasn’t even going for that.

El Gusto es mio…

AND THAT’S A PLEASURE!

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My Day in Jipijapa

The streets of Jipijapa. This is an extremely calm scene relative to most times.

The streets of Jipijapa. This is an extremely calm scene relative to most times.

Notice the name on the commercial tienda. "El Gato." Everyone has a nickname here, and this is the store owner's moniker. Every fourth man here is nicknamed El Gato. Why would any guy want to be called The Cat?

Notice the name on the commercial tienda. “El Gato.” Everyone has a nickname here, and this is the store owner’s moniker. Every fourth man here is nicknamed El Gato. Why would any guy want to be called The Cat?

Pretty typical scene. You don't even want to know how low the prices are.

Pretty typical scene. You don’t even want to know how low the prices are.

Also pretty typical.

Also pretty typical.

We have a presidential election here coming up in two weeks.

We have a presidential election here coming up in two weeks.

This is AgriPac, a store where you buy seeds, feed, chemicals, kind of an old time feed store. There is no rhyme or reason to how you get waited on in these stores. Patience carries the day, especially if you have fair skin and blue eyes.

This is AgriPac, a store where you buy seeds, feed, chemicals, kind of an old time feed store. There is no rhyme or reason to how you get waited on in these stores. Patience carries the day, especially if you have fair skin and blue eyes.

Shoes for the ladies.

Shoes for the ladies.

Maria "la Chihuahua" Blount on a mission TCB.

Maria “la Chihuahua” Blount on a mission TCB.

Street meat. Not for the gringo gastronomy. Don't go there people.

Street meat. Not for the gringo gastronomy. Don’t go there people.

The sno cone guy. Every town has several sno cone guys with carts like this. For 50 cents you can get refreshed.

The sno cone guy. Every town has several sno cone guys with carts like this. For 50 cents you can get refreshed.

Centro de Jipijapa. Center of government and commerce. Where everything happens.

Centro de Jipijapa. Center of government and commerce. Where everything happens.

Check out the price. You'd be surprised how some things are considered a luxury here. Shaving cream is one. Unfortunately, I needed it.

Check out the price. You’d be surprised how some things are considered a luxury here. Shaving cream is one. Unfortunately, I needed it.

Almuerzo.

Almuerzo.

Ciao por ahora. Hasta luego.

Ciao por ahora. Hasta luego.

I Am a Christian: A Confession and 15 Personal Principles

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(Note: This list of principles isn’t something I sit around and study, pour over daily, or even consciously consider, but rather an articulation of words expressing practices that have come naturally over time. Sometimes, in my own spiritual journey, I find it’s important to write these things down. That’s really all this is. Nothing more, nothing less.)

A general distaste for labels aside, I am a Christian whose identity is in Christ. I claim it without pride, superiority, self-righteous indignation, guilt or shame. I claim Christ as my only saving grace and aspire to follow Him. We communicate in words and so Christian is as good a word as any for what I am. I’ve found none better.

I’d also wager that because of a growing movement in my own tribe I’m considered by many as a soft, weak, even an unpatriotic Christian. The juxtaposition of those latter two words doesn’t even really work, but that’s where we are today – an entirely different topic. “Libtard.” “Moron.” Suffering from “cranial-rectal syndrome.” Those are a few things other Christ followers have called me, or said about me lately.

“Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.” John 13:35

Haha.

It’s possible during the last couple of years I’ve had upwards of a hundred conversations with non-Christians. Atheists. Agnostics. People of other non-Christian faiths. Frankly, they’re among the most constructive conversations I’ve enjoyed, and in many cases the quality of these people’s character is unsurpassed.

If you’re a Christian who’s never entertained a deep conversation with a non-Christian, you should try it. What non-Christians see in the “Christian” community, and the conversation they’ll engage you in as a result might just test you more than you know. Try, without judgment, to explain Christian evangelical support for some high-profile things non-Christians have seen in the last two years. Imagine, without emotion, how you might explain your belief system in those various contexts.

I’ve done it dozens of times, and will do it dozens more, and I’m okay with it, but it ain’t easy. I had one such conversation last night with a couple that I adore and care about as much as family.

Consistently, non-Christians express three ideas about this distaste for the faith. They say:

  1. That we almost never practice what we preach;
  2. That we claim forgiveness without repentance. (Those aren’t the words they use, but that’s what they mean.) and;
  3. They say that we rub God in their faces with language such as “God did this, or God did that,” as if He micromanages the minutia of our daily lives. Did God really cause you to find your keys? Then he also caused you to lose them, right?
This morning's sunrise over the foothills of the Andes mountain range is as good a visual as any to pop in here for some variety.

This morning’s sunrise over the foothills of the Andes mountain range is as good a visual as any to pop in here for some variety.

Because I’m frequently in these situations (and welcome them) it’s been more important than ever to find the clearest ways to articulate the who, what, where, when, why, and how of my Christian belief. It begins with knowing those things myself, not only how to express them, but how to live them. Witness is how it might be best described.

And here’s an uncomfortable confession: While I’ve never been more at peace with my beliefs based on bible study, church attendance, and the guiding of the Holy Spirit, I often tell non-Christians that I’m not the “typical” Christian. And I don’t even know if that’s really the right thing to say, or even if it’s good or bad, but it’s surely how it feels. Ah, the struggles of imperfection. Some things we’ll never understand on this side of the realm.

Since life is less about what we say (although, yes, words do very much matter) than it is about what we do, the following are some guiding principles I try to practice in being the kind of Christian I believe God wants to see in me. I fail at these things, yet try, … in no particular order of importance:

  1. Know what you believe, and why you believe it. Period.
  2. Be quick to apologize.
  3. Listen without judgment and never, never, never condemn.
  4. Understand every person you see is wounded and in need of a friend.
  5. Avoid “we vs. them” language and move through conversations slowly.
  6. Know that doubt is a part of faith and ultimately causes growth.
  7. If you remain inside four walls, the only thing you’ll ever see or know is the same four walls.
  8. Don’t be a hypocrite. Keep convictions and actions consistent and be hyper vigilant about it. It’s that simple.
  9. Be charitable, but low profile. Don’t shout your good deeds from the mountaintop.
  10. Remember, someone is always watching. See #9 above.
  11. Create for yourself a mission-field mindset the moment you walk away from the bathroom mirror each morning. This mission begins after you brush your teeth.
  12. Have a world view, and lose the false notion that God has some kind of special fondness for your homeland.
  13. In the emotional valleys, remember that the vine dresser prunes the vine so new and better fruit can grow.
  14. Be the cheerleader you always needed. We’re at our best when we’re cheering for others, plus, everyone needs a cheerleader.
  15. Jesus is the model. Live like Him. How I live like Jesus is determined by how I learn about Jesus and how I learn about Jesus is entirely up to me. But live like Jesus.

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